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every forty secondsxiv. smile
my fingers tighten upon the scalpel,
my lungs heave with laborious breaths,
and i get ready for the first cut.
a y incision is aptly named.
it makes you question,
but there's no answer to the
your skin comes apart easily,
revealing your heart and rib cage,
and i get a feeling of déjà vu
because i know you inside out.
i thought your heart would be still beating
because you're flushed, you look so alive.
i keep the scalp cut for last,
and it's with trepidation that i pull
your skin and finally hide that
smile that's forever frozen on lips
that i used to kiss.
in handwriting that barely shakes i write me in the cause of death blank.
the sky is emptyxiii. misfortune
my lover says,
"breaking mirrors is seven years of bad luck"
so we do not have
any mirrors in our house,
and check our appearance
in each other's eyes.
my lover says,
"a black cat crossing your path is not good"
so we have a dog
and no cat, and i make
sure to shoo the neighbour's
kitten away so my lover doesn't see
the shadow in our garden.
my lover says,
"opening an umbrella inside is bringing the bad luck inside"
so we both use raincoats
and the soaked floor is no
longer a problem, because we're
both soaked to the bone.
my lover tries to ward off bad luck,
because all the bad luck my lover needs is me.
the snowdens of yesteryearxii. insanity
have you ever taken
a walk in the midst of
a crowd and looked over
more than you did towards
paranoia is not a pretty
thing, and it's a shame
that the colour suits
so many people.
so i twitch and try
to stand up and close
my fists but that just
makes my palms bleed,
and i have no more space
for crescent scars
if i shy away like a wild
horse, it's just because
no one has tamed my mind
yet, not even i
it will always be junetoday, i stood next to your casket,
tears streaming in a waterfall,
enough to water all the flowers
that people had brought you.
i keep your picture in my wallet,
but i never look at it,
because i don't think my heart
can bear another crack.
what you don't know
is that when they'll bury you
monday, 17th, 2013,
my heart will be thrown into
the hole, and they'll pile dirt
upon it. maybe it'll staunch the bleeding.
people say that when you die, people who loved you keep a piece of you in their hearts.
i don't think so.
i think you take a piece of our heart, and i am afraid that one day
i won't have any pieces left.
nothing is the limiti am 5'10 barefooted,
and the 5" heels i wear
are to make boys like
insecure about women like
i only want the clicking
of my heels to be like a
for you, signaling the end of
my lipstick doesn't stain,
and my nail polish doesn't
chip, and everything about
me is made to be
so look over your shoulder
and sleep with one eye open
because one of these days,
la nuit des tempsQui aurait pensé que la fin du monde
Serait annoncée un jour où les arbres étaient en fleurs?
Les oiseaux chantent la mort
Des nations en désaccord.
Aucune ne veut reconnaître qu’elle a tort.
Une poignée d’hommes décide du sort de toute l’humanité,
Des enfants jusqu’aux aînés,
En passant par ceux qu’on connaît.
La raison est mise de côté,
Pour laisser place à l’orgueil,
Qui transformera le monde en un cercueil.
Les dirigeants des puissances mondiales,
Croyant leur idée géniale,
Ont recours aux seules solutions qu’ils connaissent,
La violence et la bassesse.
Ignorant la voix de la sagesse,
On sort les armes de gros calibres.
Plus aucun homme n’est libre.
Chaque pays a ses armements,
On ignore les valeurs d’antan.
C’est toujours la même histoire,
Allemagne, Canada, Israël, juste un autre territoire.
not gay as in happy"you don't look gay!"
"oh, you're too pretty to be gay."
should i rewind my own progress,
go back on my values,
to consider your denial
of my identity a compliment?
should i grovel and weep
for the honour of being
reduced to my looks and
nothing more, ever?
sexuality and looks are
like bananas and sharks,
cohabiting on the same earth,
but totally unrelated.
so this for every time
i spoke up, refused to
be chained by the belief
that the only good queer person
is a silent one.
coriolisi am a butterfly,
wings shedding scales
with every brush of
i fly, north and
south, looking for
some place where i
can finally belong.
i go from flower to
never committing to
a single one.
when my life is
over, my wings flutter
one last time, and i
lay down to die.
always the black knight5.97219 × 1024 kg.
that's how much the earth weighs.
i know because, each day, for
the 86,400 seconds that mean
i am a day closer to death,
i have to carry it on my shoulders.
4.068 × 1013 km.
that's how far the closest star is.
i am told to shoot for the
stars, and i try, i swear i
do, but asphyxiation is never fun,
especially when it is seen as success.
200 - 450 g.
the average weight of a human heart.
it feels like it's heavier,
but i try to remember that my
heart is a muscle, and i use it
to fight everything and everyone.
frostbittenmy fragmented bones are
chipping away and you stutter
that it wasn’t your fault
and i'm wondering if the
crystal frost on your eyelids has plagued
if the warm beating of your pulse has
disintegrated into the moon's
eternal curse of never letting
Stepseach step we take together
is noted down in the book of universe
each breath you take beside me
is counted and measured
there are only as many kisses to spare
there are only as many touches to share
one day I will abandon you one day you will forget
and our paths will never cross again
I wait patiently for the day
I speak hurtful words just so it comes sooner
but then again why do I even care when the world
is all but a stage to fill for a while
to scream on it and die and fight till the audience
anounces the winner
and you smile and cry and blush and it all complicates
everything contradicts any plan I could have made
so that I am the victor so that nothing but I emerges
from within the ruin
darling you will be the death of me
and I will die craddling you
having the last laugh
that's as hollow as the devil's heart
the little mermaid(s)we were breathing underwater
exhaling and inhaling,
the first time we'd learned how to
this was the underwater ruin
that was balancing our names
on the fringe of its star-studded tongue,
our fingers spread apart
in a million particles of ocean dust--
and her freckles were splattered
across her face like acrylic
this was our beginning.
her hips were bending and flipping
through the breaking waves like she had
and i thought about the pillaging pearls of
water that escaped her mouth when
we piroutted together beneath
the ripples of the ocean's body
(which, was practically aligned with
how much longer would we survive
before we ran out of air?
Just wanted you to knowTo me you are the most amazing thing, like the sun!
You shine so bright and you never dim until you go down.
You are my flower that I will care for.
And yet even though you tell me to go to sleep I can't. Because I love you too much.
When I talk to you I feel as if I've been injected with morphine because I feel so calm.
When I feel as if I've made you angry I feel every bone in my body fracture.
When you tell me you cry I can't help but do the same.
Its coming to Christmas soon.
And your the only Christmas I need.
And you are all I need.
I can't wait to hug you.
I can't wait to kiss you.
But there's more.
You're laugh lifts me up.
Your smile is like being confronted by diamonds.
Your hair is just simply. Fluffy.
Your eyes shine like stars.
And I promise on Christmas Eve I will stay up to talk to you. All night for me but all day for you.
All I want is you to be happy!
Because your happiness means everything to me.
Your the most beautiful thing to me.
Thought I'd just let you kno
When We Dancewhen we dance
for both the very first and last time
I feel like crying
raking my hands up and down
your willing body I know we will
be like this after today
for I know happy endings
are not meant for pairs like you and me
each time I see your smile hear your laughter
when I feel your heat slipping in-between our clasped
silhouettes my hand grasping at your hair playfully
I know this is the beginning
and the end
all in one
once and for all
I know it is indeed better for us both to part ways
to keep dreaming instead of acting on the feelings
buried deep underneath all of our daily problems
expectations of this pitiful life
that has to be spent alone
it is better for you to run away from me
as much as
it is acceptable for me not to look you in the eye
when I feel your back and throat
when your voice resonates deep within me
as you say
you love me
and I cannot swallow the bitter lump filling my throat
chemistrynitrogen is essential for all living
and i'm wondering if you're my
if i can just live off of you.
denial can be quite romantiche told her, "i like you better with your makeup off,"
as he hooked the hair that fell awkwardly in front of her face
over the red tips of her nearly frostbitten ears
"so there's a moment when you don't like me much at all?"
she said jokingly, her smile lighting up the living room
brighter and warmer than the fireplace that was alight in the corner
he laughed at her joke, and held her closer to his chest
because he knew that these sort of things don't last forever
since even the highest mountains come crashing down eventually
and she's prepared for the fall, she has a checkered history
full of betrayals and lying, whether it is the one done
with the mouth or the one down on soft beds and cramped backseats
so they enjoy the moment, and go through the motions
passionate and intimate, letting their bodies intertwine
and become one, vulnerable for just a brief, fleeting moment
but when the deed is done and they lie on opposite sides of a
cold and enormous bed, will they think about who the
Happy Birthday Darlinghappy birthday to you my darling
on this your day of birth
such special splendor this day now holds
for your birth brought into being such wonder
such magnificence personified in You
my heart excels and sparkles with knowledge
that you are in this old world making it so much better
I toast to you and tip my hat in honor of you today
Helena my darling muse on this your special day
my respect and love goes out across far oceans
to lay at your feet on this day of your birth
I honor you on this day and find happiness
that I have come to know you Helena
for the world is a large place
and the fact that I met you
fills me with the charm of good luck
love and joyous celebrations!!!!
Lazy Afternoonyou are so beautiful just like you are
no need for any superfluous gestures
tonight your warm touch is all I ask for
your neck your knees
your toes your back
so smooth and yet elegantly arched forward
I do not want to be selfish in this pleasure of mine
and as your voice whispers invitingly in my ear
and as your softly smiling face looks back at me
I know that we are two sides of the same coin
found after so many years of a seemingly incurable void
with the music resonating through our room
I am sure everything will be more than fine tonight
and perhaps we will find a place for us both in the world
ready to murder and strip us from anything that we love
if we are not careful enough and do not mind each step we take
be my muse tonight darling and let me make you immortal
as we kiss and sculpt each other and the poem
is the only witness that I ever knew you
that you ever cared and that we did find each other
in this vast and yet fucked-up universe
Vanguard, Chapter 1: DuncanDuncan's Journal: Day 1288
I consider myself a good man. I respect women, elders, my equals, and the dead. I say a morning prayer, and an evening one. Hell, I even thank the gods for a meal, instead of immediately chowing down in the voracious manner as the other soldiers here do. By all logical means, I should be in paradise. No really, not just because I'm a good man, but also because I should be dead by now. So I ask myself: why, oh gods up there, have I ended up in hell?
1288 days. 1288 days of my life have been spent in this misery, and I'm beginning to lose faith in the glory I was promised. Some of the rookies still live in their ignorant bliss, but I've lived long enough to realize that there's not much glory to find here. “Sing the songs of glory and march into battle—-join The Crusade today!”. Such were the words of the posters The Crusade has spread all over The Mortal Realm. Gullible fools practically stand in line for these songs of glory that th
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